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CoMaBoY 10-13-2000 01:55 AM

People who farts...
 
Fart Psych 101

There are many types of people who fart every day. It's your job to identify them, point them, out, and call them by name! (Assuming it wasn't you who did it, of course!) Here's a quick run-down of the type of people you're likely to catch farting around you on a daily basis:

The Vain Person: One who loves the smell of his own farts.

The Amiable Person: One who loves the smell of other people's farts.


The Proud Person: One who thinks his farts are exceptionally fine.


The Shy Person: One who releases silent farts and then blushes.


The Impudent Person: One who farts loudly and then laughs.


The Scientific Person: One who farts regularly but is truly concerned about air pollution.


The Unfortunate Person: One who tries awfully hard to fart but poops instead.


The Nervous Person: One who stops in the middle of a fart.


The Honest Person: One who admits he farted but offers a medical reason for it.


The Dishonest Person: One who farts and then blames the dog.


The Foolish Person: One who suppresses a fart for hours and hours.


The Thrifty Person: One who always has several farts in reserve.


The Anti-Social Person: One who excuses himself and farts in complete privacy.


The Strategic Person: One who conceals his farts with loud laughter.


The Sadistic Person: One who farts in bed and then fluffs the bed covers over his bed mates head.


The Intellectual Person: One who determines from the smell of his neighbor's fart precisely the latest food item he consumed.


The Athletic Person: One who farts at the slightest exertion.


The Miserable Person: One who would truly love to but can't fart at all.


The Sensitive Person: One who farts and then bursts into tears.


The Bruiser: One who farts so hard and loud that he bruises his butt cheeks.


-------Keep Farting!--------

CoMaBoY 10-13-2000 02:02 AM

Re: People who farts...
 
Oh yeah and few facts too...


Fart Facts
There is a very, serious side to farting, my friends. At this very moment, there are intelligent people huddled in white lab coats studying farts under a microscope and getting paid with a government grant. As much as you may like to fart, is this really your idea of a good time? Would farting be nearly as fun if you had to study them closely day in and day out?


To better understand the physiology of colonic gas production, each flatus passage of 16 subjects over a 4-h period was analyzed by gas chromatography for N2, O2, H2, CO2, CH4, and for odoriferous sulfur-containing gases. Appreciable intraindividual and enormous interindividual variability was observed, indicating that each gas passage reflected the interaction of highly variable liberation and/or removal mechanisms.

The predominant flatus gas was CO2, H2, and N2 in seven, six, and three subjects, respectively. Gases produced intraluminally (H2, CO2, and CH4) comprised approximately 74% of flatus, and rapid CO2 and H2 productions were responsible for high passage rates. A positive correlation between flatus H2 and CO2 suggested that CO2, like H2,mainly was a bacterial product.

Composition:

Nitrogen (N2)
Oxygene (O2)
Carbon Dioxide(CO2)
Hydrogen (H2)
Methane (CH4)
Other components in less portion, but they are responsible by smell (Methyl-Indol, Skatol, Hydrogen Sulfide, Methyl-Mercaptan)


Jesus what a pic... found it somewhere sick place...





[This message has been edited by CoMaBoY (edited October 13, 2000).]

TheDarthJedi 10-13-2000 02:47 AM

Re: People who farts...
 
what about someone who farts in a jar.. then seals that jar.. and then stores that jar in their garage.......?

... somethin I recall Big Nasty sayin he did.... but this was a good year ago... perhaps he has changed????

HA!

CoMaBoY 10-13-2000 03:06 AM

Re: People who farts...
 
Try do this :
Fart.. Catch it.. seal it in a jar... and paint it red <-- (fart)

Think about that! hih


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